Daily Dilemma #3- The Andy Lau obsession

I am in love with Andy Lau.

I think i maaaaaaay be obsessed. You've seen 'infernal affairs' right? If not, go see it. Anyway, i saw it for the millionth time a week ago and ever since then, i kind of keep having less-than-innocent dreams about him. And when i mean less-than-innocent... i mean the furthest point from innocent that you could possibly imagine..

I know... he's in Hong Kong.. I'm in the UK...but it could work right?

Right?

La fille meilleure gagnee

Mon côté anglais est une dame sarcastique confiante, et mon côté français est un romantique ayant la larme à l'oeil. Pourquoi est-il plus facile de parler des sentiments ici ?Mon ami s'est récemment réuni avec quelqu'un que j'étais vraiment étroitement avec. Et j'étais désolé. Mais j'ai eu le temps à chauffer au-dessus de lui et je pense que ce n'est pas ce mauvais. Après tous, parfois les gens juste ne cliquent pas, et nous n'avons pas fait. Je ne devrais pas la blâmer de celle, parce que je l'aime aux morceaux. Si elle est dehors là, j'espère elle sait que je ne suis pas fou, et cela il a juste fallu à heure de trier des choses parce qu'il était très inattendu. Mais la fille meilleure gagnée.

Ray X

Why i decided to stay...

I have been asked loads of times lately why i'm not getting a super-rich magazine job straight out of the course, and after having to tell the same story again to my course tutor today i feel like i should explain myself somewhere... and where else than my own blog?

Truth is... i'm not ready. I'm not ready to move across the country, and i'm not ready for that big job. I applied for a dream job in Bristol and i was really crushed when i didn't get it (my coursemate did) but then i thought that if i've have got it, what then? If i'd moved all the waaay down there... i would have gone to peices. I know that when i'm ready i'll kick ass, but right now university (x2) has taken it out of me. I need time out! No dissertations, no coursework, no required reading times a million... and at the same time no 9 to 5, no mortages and no deadlines.

I guess it's different for everyone, but right now, and for the moment, i''m right at home here.

So stop bugging me.

Ray xxx

It's not like i'm sat around doing nothing...(yet another rant)

So there i was... sat on msn chatting away to a mate i haven't seen for ages. And when i mean ages, i mean like four years ages. It's a lovely convo- a real catch-up about what we've been up to, and where we've travelled to blah blah blah. And then suddenly, with no warning, comes the question I've heard so many times in the same negative accusatory tone (WAIT: yes I'm well aware msn does not necessarily have a 'tone', unless you insist on pissing all over the page with icons and shit... acceptable if you're 15 and under or a sheltered geek. I mean when i have heard the question said out loud it sounds negative and accusatory).....

"So why the hell are you still single?"

Oooo the answers i was tempted to give... because i have incurable halitosis, because i have one leg, because i am blessed with a voice resembling Dame Edna- what are you supposed to say to that? I got the feeling that he thought I'd just been sat around watching TV for four years eating Doritos and McCain microchips- excuse me? It's not like I'm not fucking trying!! I'm failing abysmally, but please, go on and highlight the fact that i am single. Go on! My pet hate is when the same question is asked by a couple, who are sat in front of you, drinking out of their matching mugs and draped all over each other- as if they're saying 'oi ginger- what's up with you? do you not shave or something?'.

There's that uncontrollable urge to hit something again... i'll save it for when i'm at work later...

Ray 'i'm-honestly-trying-but-leicester-isn't-exactly-brimming-with-eligible-guys-willing-to-put-up-with-my-shit' xx

Dilemma #2- nearly homeless Ray

Today's dilemma is a long running one and may be solved! I think i've finally found a house! It's gorgeous and is slap-bang opposite none other than Mr Barry Stevens himself (i.e the Turkey supervisor not the hairdresser near new walk... stupid). I've got to go check it out... wish me luck! I could be living in town veeeeeerrrryyy soon!

And theres you thinking i was going to have a moan! ha!

Ray x

d'autres filles et moi...

Pourquoi quelques choses d'IS-IS il est beaucoup plus facile dire en français ?Il m'inquiète parfois que je donne trop loin trop rapide. Je donne à quelqu'un tout parce qu'il que je pense qu'il leur fera le séjour, mais à la place ils marchent all over moi. Ceci le prix que je doivent payer juste est été gentil ? Je ne sais pas vivre aucune autre manière. Il y a d'autres les filles qui semblent obtenir en avant de moi en gardant un peu plus de mystère. mais je m'inquiète que je doive donner plus pour suivre elles. Je ne sais pas...

Photo catch-up: Emma#1's burfday

Like all good parties... a good majority of it is spent gossiping in the toilets. Or in the case of emma's birthday, drunkenly defacing the University of Leicester's toilet posters (complete with the pulling of photo case thingys off the toilet doors in a red bull hype) and kicking each other.

Two weeks ago... and the photos still make me crease. What makes me laugh is that my photos can cover the time when gorgeous Emma #3 (demoted... naughty naughty) dissappeared from Brighton Beach for a while..

My version of the night starts with 'that-girl-wot-i'm-related-to' Emma#2 and Rosy. Met them after a crappy 6-12 shift...

Clearly i have arrived during some kind of bitching session. This is pretty much what Emma and Rosy do on a night out- drink/dance/bitch/laugh/deface things (Emma)

Emma #1 however, is busy having a great time. Rosy and i bought her a gorgeous pair of earrings and she gave me a big kiss to say thank you. I'm going to miss her when she goes to Leeds...

The Emmas in general are all very beautiful- right down to the tiniest details. Emma here, is proving that even the armpits of all Emma's are gorgeous. See? Not a hair in sight.

We tried to get on with a bit of group photo taking. Emma looks like a random girl that wanted to be in the photo. Genius.

N.b. My arm is not that big usually. I have it squashed against my side because my mobile was falling out of my hand. Just so you know. Rosy's dress is lovely. They do a similar one in Joy if you fancied dressing like her..

We saw Mike! One of the old supervisors @ the Turkey before Stevie started and Ryan left. He came from the Wyrell(?) and smoked loads of weed.

To do the 'Mike': you make a gurning type face, twiddle your imaginary beard hair and say in a scousey way "aaiii yallriiight. I'm gonna hav a bit o weeed nooww". Endless fun.

Note to self: never try and take a photo of Rosy and Emma by first saying "i want a really nice one for my wall. i don't have any of the three of us." It's a recipe for disaster.

Exhibit A. (p.s how the hell does Rosy make that face?)

So i gave up with trying to get nice photos and let the Red Bull flow... turning a nice photo sesh into a 'lets-see-how-many-crappy-photos-i-can-take-and-ill-post-them-everywhere' rampage.

See the mischievious look in my eyes..

The war is on...

Starting with Rosy. She's so fun to take pictures of because she can effortlessly come up with hilarious faces. This one scares me a little though. I don't think that face is physically possible...

They should have just behaved when i asked them too.

Emma#2 however, is just fucking annoying... even when i catch her unawares she comes out of it looking pretty good still. Bitch. Vote for her on http://www.69-247.com/ to win the face of Barry Stevens comp.

She could be the picture girl for Strongbow too....

Clearly, noone was watching Emma#1 who was drowning herself in Strongbow and Red Stripe...

This is Mr.Almond. He works at Gutho. He's allegedly rumoured to have done naughty things with students (i said 'allegedly'- you can't fucking touch me stupid lawyers.. i know the laws of defamation)

Look at him. Leather jacket, fag in mouth, floppy hair.. pure greaseball.

So we thought it would be hilarious to get Emma to go over and chat to him....

Although Mr.Almond was liking the fresh female attention too much and we began to get a little worried. He is greasy after all....

Emma#1 is oblivious to the plight of Emma#2 so that's okay

Emma returns unscathed... and looking very smug. Note my big(little) sister face...I'm slowly wishing i'd not driven.. gagging for a malibu and coke..

Me and my sis....aww..

How fucking tall is this guy?

We liked his mate.. he reminded us of Mario. Why the hell would you let a guy like this into Brighton Beach?? I should have asked to see his student card..

Mario liked my sister more... such is life.

I was going to sulk in the toilets... but then i saw thse guys.. how very random. Maybe it's the cool thing to do if you're bored @ Brighton Beach?

Yes, that poster has just come off the wall. Rosy, Emma and I decided to go for a chill in the toilets.. as it was all hot and sweaty and i really wanted to check my photos so far..

Who wins the shoe competition? Rosy! Plus she gets extra points for having matching toenails. Very classy.

Argh! This fucking guy pissed me off! He was trying to get into the ladies toilets and i politely told him where the men's were and he started giving me lip. I took his photo just in case i saw him on crimewatch for molesting women in toilets. I was gonna kick him a bit, but i was wearing a dress.

Emma can't quite understand what took us so long... i did try to explain about the man but she was having none of it.

But then she fell back in love with her handbag and all was forgiven..

Emma and Neil!

Things were getting messier and messier... i was getting ready to duck out...

Emma gets saucy....

Neil is trying to surpass my photo skills... it'll never work...

Aww.. Night Night birthday girl!

Daily dilemma #1- suspicious letter on the doormat

Told you i'd keep you entertained...

So when i was in Birmingham on friday with Steve and Tom... i sort of got clocked by a speed camera. Which wouldn't have been that bad if a) i only was a teeny weeny bit over the speed limit, b)i wasn't in my dad's car and c)i wasn't insured under his name. But i was doing about 60 ish in a 40 zone... in my dad's focus (which we kind of share.. but to all intents and purposes he owns).

There is a letter on the doormat. I have a horrible feeling it is the 'are-you-aware-what-a-twatty-driver-your-daughter-is-you're-going-to-have-to-pay-the-fine-for-her' letter... mainy because the font looks really policey. I haven't got round to telling him yet. Do i, a) tell him and try and pick up brownie points for being honest...b)pretend i had no idea, play the emotional card and cry a lot or c)open the letter and try and sort it myself? (potential problems with c- it may not be that letter and then i'm in trouble for opening his goddamn post.)

Something to mull over methinks...

2003-2007 A basic recent history of Ray

Let's play catch-up.

Some of you will know me as Rach, others as Ray or Razzle (or 'poppet' if you happen to be my dad)- truth is all the names belong to the same 22 year old redhead... me.

So... how did i end up a post-grad student working in a bar in Leicester? Let's see shall we?

This is me in winter 2002 @ Creation with my then best mate Amanda. For all Leicester girls my age, Creation was the place to be. Well, sort of. Anyway, i danced the weekends away while i did my A-levs in Wigston....

As you can see... i was much much fatter than i am now. But i had a great rack, so all wasn't that bad.

I don't miss Creation. All the boys that thought you were going to fall head over heels in love with them if they rubbed themselves up behind you..bleugh. And the drinks...i used to only drink SoCo and lemonade at that point. How utterly niave.

So anyway... i finished up in Wigston and upped myself and moved to Bir-min-gum to study at the oh-so-gorgeous UoB... a red brick university that looked like universities are supposed to look. I changed so much in the first year...dropped three dress sizes, gained an uncontrollable addiciton of buying clothes and shoes (in my defence i lived a ten minute walk away from the Bullring...recipe for disaster) and my signature drink had changed to tequila. straight with no gay trimmings. And it had to be jose...

This is what i looked then. I love this photo... this was taken in Zanzibar (n.b Leicester kids... the one in Birmingham was MUCH better and there were less 'yis mate yis mate' chavs). It was for my flatmate Hannah's birthday and we divided the girls into cowboys and indians. I was sherrif.. obviously.

God my hair is orange.

In feb 2004... still in my freshers year. I began working at a bar- Revolution. I shouldn't have even got an interview... i had no bar experience and they were then one of the busiest bars on Broad Street. But my hair saved me. The manager had a weird love for redheads (his last two wives were ginger) so he hired me on the spot when i came in in the middle of the day dressed in ripped jeans and a UoB sweater. They taught me everything i know about alcohol....well, mainly vodka. I know all about grains and polish vodka history.. and which goes best with which mixer blah blah blah, although you wouldn't think it when you see me work. Every night looks like my first night. I'm just naturally clumsy i guess.. but at least i'm damn entertaining.

It was here that i truly came out of my shell. From a timid little ginger girl who got bullied through school and college to a thinner, confident bar supervisor who got over £20 in tips on a good night and even a few phone numbers on napkins too!

They may not think so, but i owe these two everything. Danny and Shafi, my two best friends for soooo long. They rock. And i love them to peices. We used to dance while we worked and shout 'tune' to each other when our favourite house tracks came on. Plus we'd spend ages chatting and giving each other advice.

Summer 2004... i had a great time. Mainly in Paris. It's where my love for all things French and a overwhelming love for art comes from. Most of you that know me very well will either hear me babble on about Paris, Revolution or both... so i wont bother you with all the details here.

Passed first year with flying colours, moved three times (!) in the second year (don't ask... long-ass story involving a mean flatmate who called environmental health in on our lovely but weird landlord plus many fall outs and stuff that i regret.) and began my final year living on Hubert Road, Selly Oak.

And became firm mates with this motely crew. God, i had such a fun time in my last year. I learnt so many things living in house with one other girl and four blokes. Things like:

1) Learning how to use an xbox (it's hard for a girly girl...) and becoming good enough to be allowed to sit in the living room and join in. I was the type of Halo player that would sit on a ledge high up and bomb people with rockets.. and the type of GTA player that would take ho's out in my car, fuck them and then take back the money...i'm sure everyone's done that right?

2) Seeing how the other side of relationships and how the lads coped with their girlfriend dilemmas. Very insightful.

3)Learning a HELL of a lot about music (thank you Neil and Dave).... music was on 24/7 in our house... and i quickly became addicited to it. It's weird to think that i can't sit in a room by myslef anymore without having some kind of music on...If it wasn't for them i don't know where i'd be now. Certainly not live music editor @ a local magazine..

Having said that though...there were some aspects about boys i never figured out. Like how boys can get so much water on the floor in the bathroom...or why they have to use a whole roll for one toilet session. Or why they insist on putting their food on everybody else's shelves in the fridge when there are clearly marked areas (argh!!)

The highlight of my year was getting a photoshoot session for my xmas from my then-boyfriend Dan. I was so scared and nervous.. but this is what they came up with. Nice huh?

So that brings us to summer 2006... end of my final year. I was worried i would fail after taking the shock decision to base my dissertation on pornography, but i did okay. I graduated with a high 2.1 in BA Media, Culture and Society...basically media theory.

I moved back to Leicester, and began a post-grad course at the very lovely DMU. I've always wanted to write... either books or for a magazine. I'd looooove to write for Vogue, but maybe that's a good decade away. So i became a student again, this time vowing to do things differently.. no counselling this time (another story for another time), more dancing, and more exersise. I joined a pole dancing class in Barrow-on-soar (which i still attend regularly) and own a pole too... just to keep nice and thin and flexible. I began to learn french (and now blog sometimes in french... use an online dictionary to translate if you want).

That course is nearly finished (few exams to go now), and i'm really going to miss these people....

They've totally kept me sane...and we get up to as much drinking and dancing as we work, ferreting away in our own private Mac lab.

Those that know me well will know that i take hundreds and hundreds of photos of my friends because i love them so much. This night.. which just happened to be Valentines Day (i love being in a relationship.. and i was all sad and single so we decided to organise a night out and run riot round Zanzibar while all the students were getting it on with each other. I owe the hacks for that). I took 145 photos that night. 80 made it to fbook. Go see.

The other half of my leicester life is spent at my current place of work- The lovely Turkey Cafe. Night after night, i drop glasses and spill drinks and make mistakes... but we end up all having a right laugh. Plus i can make a damn good cosmo and pinapple sour. I love them turkey people (and of course our honorary bar staff: Emma's #2 and #3, Gaz, Jonny, Andy J, Ryan, Steph etc)- they make my random turbulent life seem a little less stressful.

That brings us to the present. What else do you need to know? I get myself into very very sticky situations, say stupid things and get up to lots of mischief. So i'll keep you entertained, don't worry.

By the way, this is me. Yesterday.

Much Love, Ray xx