So there i was... sat on msn chatting away to a mate i haven't seen for ages. And when i mean ages, i mean like four years ages. It's a lovely convo- a real catch-up about what we've been up to, and where we've travelled to blah blah blah. And then suddenly, with no warning, comes the question I've heard so many times in the same negative accusatory tone (WAIT: yes I'm well aware msn does not necessarily have a 'tone', unless you insist on pissing all over the page with icons and shit... acceptable if you're 15 and under or a sheltered geek. I mean when i have heard the question said out loud it sounds negative and accusatory).....
"So why the hell are you still single?"
Oooo the answers i was tempted to give... because i have incurable halitosis, because i have one leg, because i am blessed with a voice resembling Dame Edna- what are you supposed to say to that? I got the feeling that he thought I'd just been sat around watching TV for four years eating Doritos and McCain microchips- excuse me? It's not like I'm not fucking trying!! I'm failing abysmally, but please, go on and highlight the fact that i am single. Go on! My pet hate is when the same question is asked by a couple, who are sat in front of you, drinking out of their matching mugs and draped all over each other- as if they're saying 'oi ginger- what's up with you? do you not shave or something?'.
There's that uncontrollable urge to hit something again... i'll save it for when i'm at work later...
Ray 'i'm-honestly-trying-but-leicester-isn't-exactly-brimming-with-eligible-guys-willing-to-put-up-with-my-shit' xx
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment